Wine, Scissors and Make Up Kisses
by Speedy Speck
Summary: A drunken Tifa decides to do something about Reno's constant preening...One-Shot...Written for 'KCVII'


Disclaimer: Final Fantasy does not belong to me...however much I may like it to. I own no characters, places etc. etc. so please don't sue me! I'm a nice person :)

Author's Note: This is my forty-eighth fanfic...It's another RenoxTifa!...Oh and this was written for 'KCVII'... PLEASE review as I really enjoy reading your views and they inspire me to get better! It would make me very very happy! Anyway stop reading this and get on with reading the fic! Hope you enjoy! :)

Every day the Turk would preen and tend to his glorious red plumage.

Before work...

After work...

During the night...

During the day...

Sometimes even during the wee hours, where both day and night collided and meshed into one.

And quick frankly Tifa had had enough...

* * *

The brunette let out a sigh as she tapped her fingers absent-mindedly on the hard, smooth surface in the kitchen. After a few more minutes of silence she turned and observed the time displayed in blue on the microwave's digital clock.

_We are gunna be soooo late... _''Where is he...?'' No sooner had she mumbled the words, when the Turk came crashing through the front door.

''Yo babe! I know, I know I'm late, but Tseng kept yapping at me!'' His voice was breathy but still buzzing with energy.

''Well you're here now, and...where...where are you going?'' Tifa's eyebrows arched in confusion as the young man seemed to be rather lazily strolling down the corridor.

''I'll be right with you Tif, I just gotta go check on my locks!''

Her eyes widened in both anger and annoyance, ''Reno we're late already!''

''Pfft so what...as long as my hair looks good...nothing else matters...''

''Well it matters to me! Anyway your hair looks fine!''

He opened his mouth in shocked outrage, ''Fine? Fine? That's not good enough! It must look SPECTACULAR!''

The brunettes head hit the surface with a loud thump as she sighed in disbelief.

* * *

Over an hour later and Tifa still sat in the kitchen, though now she had consumed a bottle of very nasty tasting red wine that the red head had bought with him from his old apartment when he moved in with her.

Her eyes were glazed over, and her fingers were fumbling with the empty bottle of their own accord, while she attempted to stand up.

She soon realised that her balance had definitely been effected by the large quantity of alcohol and she nearly crashed into the fridge.

Just as the brunette was straightening herself the red head strolled back in the room, with a cheery smile plastered to his face, ''Yo come on babe, I'm ready!''

''Do you have ANY idea how long you were in there!'' Tifa had always been an angry drunk and this time was no exception.

The Turk's eyes shifted from the walls to the floor, looking anywhere but at the young woman, ''Erm...''

''You've been in there for ages! We've already missed half of the damn film!''

He tried to pull a apologetic puppy face in an attempt to calm the brunette, ''Sorry...''

''You're sorry...Grrr! You're infuriating! How could you spend so long on your damn hair!''

Reno looked at her like she'd just insulted his dying grandmother, ''Hey don't talk so loudly! You'll upset it...''

''Upset it...upset it! I'm gunna bloody kill it!''

The brunette stumbled over to the utensils draw and pulled out a rather sharp looking pair of scissors.

As soon as the red head caught a flash of the glinting metal his eyes widened with an intense fear, ''What...what are going to do with those...?''

''I'm gunna put a stop to this ridiculous habit of yours! I can't stand it any more! It's like living with some self obsessed valley girl!'' And with that Tifa started chasing the young Turk around the table waving the scissors at him threateningly.

''Don't! Don't you dare!'' Soon the red head had run from the room, with Tifa close behind.

Before long the pair were running in circles around the coffee table, ''Come back here!''

''Not likely!''

Thinking fast Tifa pointed at his head and said with all seriousness, ''Is that a grey hair...?''

''What! Where?''

Although the Turk only slowed slightly, it was enough and in one quick snip a sudden weight was lifted from the young man's head.

The long flame red pony tail softly floated down and landed on the floor in a deathly silence.

Reno stared at it for a few seconds in pure shock before letting out a dramatic howl, ''Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!''

The young woman watched with a somewhat amused expression as he started picking it up tentatively and stroking the soft fibres, ''It's all right...we'll just put it on ice...and get it re attached...''

''It's not a severed limb Reno! You can't just stick it back on...''

''But...but...'' The red head looked up at her, tears forming in his aquamarine orbs.

The brunette's features softened, sensing maybe she'd gone a little to far, ''...maybe this is a blessing in disguise hm?''

He glared at her, his eyes shining with both anger and sorrow, ''You monster...''

Silence.

''We need to bury it.''

Tifa's left eyebrow raised to a strange angle as she looked at the red head, ''You...you are joking right?''

* * *

After a rather dramatic funeral type ceremony, in which Reno cried and made a speech about how he would miss the way the red hair hung down his back like a cobra and flowed in the wind like a...flowy thing, the pair went back inside and sat on the couch in silence.

When the Turk's tears seemed to fade slightly, Tifa took his hand and gave him a comforting smile, ''It'll grow back...''

''Do you have any idea how long that'll take! WAHAHA!'' Tifa sighed as she watched the young man begin to sob uncontrollably into a cushion.

''You're being a little over dramatic sweetie...''

''Over dramatic? You just cut off half my hair!''

''Well...I still love you...even without the hair. Doesn't that mean anything?''

Reno's face stilled for a moment before burying his head into Tifa's lap, ''Yeah...I love you too...even if you just basically castrated me...''

''I cut off your hair not your-''

But she was cut off by another loud sob for the young man now lying rather uncomfortably on her thighs.

In hindsight she decided maybe it wasn't such a great idea to have chopped off the Turk's long locks, because now she had to deal with a big baby rather than a preening peacock of a man.

* * *

The next morning when Tifa finally woke up, she was met with a terrible hangover and she vowed to never drink wine again. Well at least for a few days. When you're going out with Reno you need alcohol on standby.

After a shower and breakfast the memories of the night before came flashing back to the brunette and soon she was overcome by a terrible guilt and spend the rest of the day trying to figure out a way to make it up to him.

When the red head arrived back from work he skipped into the living room rather merrily, but soon halted when he saw the brunette standing in the middle of the room.

''What...what have you done?'' His eyes drifted over the young woman, taking in the now very short locks that graced her head.

''I cut my hair! So now...we've even!'' She was smiling at him, but the excitement seemed rather forced.

''Erm babe...'' The Turk slowly reached around and pulled forward a long chunk of red hair, identical to the one he'd lost.

Tifa's mouth hung open in silence and Reno decided maybe he should elaborate, ''You know Shin-Ra is full of crazy yet brilliant scientists?...Well I told them about my hair loss and they grew it back for me super fast! Looks better than ever don't it babe?'' He shook the long flame red locks as if to prove they were genuine.

She looked at him, slightly dumbfounded, ''They...they can do that?''

''Uh huh!''

''So I cut off my hair...for nothing?'' Her mouth now hung open in disappointment and exasperation.

''Not for nothing!'' Reno walked right up to the young woman and took her lightly by the shoulders, gazing deep into her reddy-brown eyes, ''It's kinda nice...that you'd do this for me...I appreciate it...''

The red head raised his pale hand and ran the thin fingers through her now short dark locks before pulling her into a deep kiss, during which the pair both seemed to forgive eachother for the events of the previous night.

When they parted for air Tifa laid her head on the young man's shoulder and mumbled into his clothing, ''Reno...?''

''Hm?''

''Do you think Shin-Ra could grow back my hair too?''

Reno let out a low chuckle before taking wrapping his arms ever so slightly tighter around the young woman's back, ''Sure thing babe.''

* * *

From that day forward Reno certainly talked less about his hair.

Around Tifa at least.

Rude still got an earful though.

But he didn't mind.

After all he'd never have to worry about going grey.

Reno on the other hand...

* * *

A/N= I just wanted to say I don't condone running with scissors or any other sharp pointy objects...Kinda :P


End file.
